Fairy Tales Weddings and Worries

Fairy tale weddings DO happen. It's every brides desire that this day be just how she wants it to be with as few hitches to the plan as possible. Planning, of course, is key to making that happen and there are all kinds of resources available to help the modern day bride plan well. But, whenever us humans decide ahead of time that we want something, anything, to be PERFECT, we're going to worry at some point about the outcome.

Your groom will probably worry less than you and may even frequently tell you to relax more, but it's likely he'll have a few "what if" moments of his own. The big question is how you can handle your wedding day worries so that when you finally walk down that aisle, you are absolutely gorgeous, relaxed, and look as happy and peaceful on the outside as you feel on the inside.

Let's get real for a moment. In the fairy tale Sleeping Beauty, I bet the beautiful princess never planned on being asleep that long, so it's a good thing to remember that even with the best laid plans, everything might not go as planned. Life is like that, and I think that's okay because it helps us focus on what's really important and let the details be, well, just the details.

The good news of the Sleeping Beauty story is that after she finally woke up, her life was great . . . the moral is that even if your big day isn't perfect, the marriage is what counts. Someday you'll look back at any wedding day fiasco's that happen and, you know . . . smile. After all, the perfect part isn't really summed up in the events, as great as they may be. Instead, the day is perfect, no matter what happens, because you and your man are perfect for each other and this day is for declaring that and celebrating it!

Here's a little tip, a system if you will, that my husband came up with to help he and I navigate through our worries . . . I think it could work for brides and grooms too as you plan for your wedding day and as you experience it. It's called the worry factor plan.

Whenever something goes wrong, we take a step back and assign it a number on the worry factor scale. If the issue isn't a huge one, it might get a worry factor of a 2 or 3, whereas a significant problem would get a much higher factor, like an 8 or a 9.

Why do we go through this silly step? Because sometimes just taking a step back from a problem to briefly evaluate it puts it in perspective and clears our head to come up with workable solutions. Also, if a problem crops up when we can't discuss it right away, we can shoot each other an email or text message with the topic and the "WF" rating. That lets the other know that something needs to be addressed and how important it is.

My husband came up with the system because he isn't real fond of coming through the door at the end of the day and being "surprised" by a problem. It gives him some time to prepare to deal with an issue, and knowing the 'worry factor' ahead of time actually keeps him from becoming obsessively concerned.

What do you think of the worry factor system? Or, how do you handle it when things go wrong? Please share your ideas in the comments!

Best, Cheryl